For this past August, i think i fell in love to one guy just name him as M.
M is a chinese dancer study the same school as me.
We are so close together, and i know he treat every girl the same.
He lives only across my apartment and we always go home together after rehearsal.
And i admit that i'm a girl that always think too much about relationship from a boy to a girl.
He's too sweet to me. When i was sick, he brought me to the clinic, he reminded me to eat my medicine, he woke me up from my nap, brought me every medicine that he has in his house, he gave me his shirt when i said i'm so cold. I know he will do this to every girl-friend that he has. but still, i'm melting.
And someday, i told my true feeling to one of my senior, just said she is F.
F is a senior of mine and friend of M. and She is indonesian.
She told me about her feeling to one guy, and i told her mine as well.
and i told her that i have feeling with F, because he is too sweet.
And i don't know what happen, at the night, they chat to each other and F let him know that someone likes him, and M is super curious and call me directly. I dont know why, and maybe he can feel that i like him ?
Whatever, and he told in the phone that HE LIKES ME, because i'm different with other girls and i always bring laugh to people. That touched me. Really. But i never told him anything i just always post random status which i think i'm super stupid to attract his attention from facebook.
I decided to ask him what did he mean by LIKE ? like as friend or like as a girl.
Monday night when we are heading home after movie with Feli, Celi, Anuj, Chris, and Manolo, i put down every single of my shyness and ask him this question. Before, he said he would answer everything STRAIGHTFORWARDLY. but when i asked him, he HESITATE. Okay, that is dissapointed for me, and it shows that he just LIKES me as a FRIEND, not more. I'm the one who think too much of everything. After that we decided not to go home, and go for a walk, and we stay until 6am in the morning without going home. We talked about everything, about our exs, our family, our everything, I've been honest to him about my feeling, and we decide to be COOL as friend. Yes, even the end he answered that he likes me as a girl, but we can't go for further steps, and we decided to be FRIEND that is COOL ! We are not awkward at all to each other, maybe yes sometimes, but then we are bestfriend that understand each other more deeply. And i found that is super nice ! He can talk to me about everything, he is asking about my opinion about his problems, anything, And i love this relationship. We care and talked as buddy, even sometimes i feel i'm so useless and bad because i keep my feelling to him, and always pretend that we are cool. I'm so sorry, maybe this is only my temporary feeling, just let time solve it.
Adios <3
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